EroticReverie

Two more guys fuck me that afternoon before I decide that I can't take anymore and walk myself home. 

About half way there I hear a car rolling to a stop just as I get to my neighborhood. I close my eyes and hold my breath as I walk, and shiver, my hands curling into fists.

Please dont stop. Please dont stop. Please dont.

"Hey" a voice says and I exhale as I look over, it's the kid from the FFA Building, the cleaner. 

"Marcus?" I say. 

"Get in, I'll give you a ride"  he says. 

"This is my neighborhood" I point. "It's fine, thank you" I say and keep walking.

His car rolls beside me. 

"Sorry  if I'm creeping you out" he says. 

I turn my head as I walk. "You're not." I say and look forward again.

"Is it okay if I drive beside you then and make sure you get home okay?" He asks, and I stop walking and let out a laugh.

I hold up my arm with the FFA tracker on my wrist. "This makes it so it doesnt matter if I get home okay...I'm purposely NOT supposed to get home okay" I say and throw my hand back down and walk faster now.

"Sorry" he says and leans over his passenger seat as he still rolls behind me. 

"I admit I don't know hot to talk to girl...I always seem to say the wrong stuff" he says and I stop again. I look at him.

"It's fine. It's not your fault this happened to me." I say and keep walking. 

"What's your actual name?" he says. 

"It doesn't matter anymore" I say, feeling the soreness between my legs, a reminder that all I am now is a number, a walking set of holes for men to use as they please. 

"Sure it does" he says.

I shake my head. 

"Do you wanna hang out with me?" he says and I stop again.

"Why?" i ask. 

His forehead creases. "What do you mean why?" he says. "Because" 

"So you can have sex with me?" I say.

"No" he says offended. "I already told you, I don't...do that."

"Then what? Why would you want to hang out with a government whore?" I ask. 

His eyes are sad. "You're not a...whore" he says. 

I look at him and his eyes are apologizing to me, on behalf of all men, for what they've done, what they'll do in the future, and his eyes are sincere, that he doesn't agree with it. 

"It never hurts to have good friends" he says. 

"I like to think I'm a good friend." he says and I sigh. 

I walk the few steps, he unlocks the door, stopping the car and I get in. 

"So what do you wanna do?" he asks.

I give a shrug. 

"you hungry?" he asks. 

"no money." I say.

"Are you hungry though?" he says. 

I look to him. "sorta" 

but I'm not sure whatever I eat will stay down after the day I've had. The days I know I'm going to continue to have. 

"What's your favorite thing to eat?" he asks.

I think about it for a moment as we're parked on the street leading into my neighborhood. 

"Pizza" I answer.

"Me too!" he says as he slaps the wheel and then puts the car into drive and give a slight laugh at his excitement. 

We end up at a small pizzeria  in a tiny strip mall. 

"Stay in the car, I'll grab us some slices, what kind do you want?" he asks getting out. 

I'm thankful  he didn't suggest that I get out with him. Even though i'd be with a guy, and off limits to anyone else who might see the bracelet on my wrist. I didn't want to be seen right now with it on. 

"I don't have any money" I say. 

"I got you" he says. "Cheese good?" he asks.

I give a little smile and nod. "Yea. Thanks" I say quietly. He smiles and shuts his door and jogs across the lot to the pizzeria. I sit in the car he left turned on, and I turn up his ac, cranking it.

I wince sitting in the seat as I squirm and point the air vents between my legs, as I lift my skirt and my ass up off the seat. I whimper, trying to find any relief to the burning pain between my legs as I sit. 

About five minutes later I see Marcus come out and sit in my seat normally and flip the vents back up. 

He opens the door and slides in and shivers. 

"You hot or something?" he says and sets the two small pizza boxes ont he dash and hands me a soda. 

"I-yeah...I was..but I'm fine now" I say and flip off his ac. 

He shrugs. "You can keep it on, I don't mind, most girls are just always cold" he shrugs. "At least my mom and sisters always are" he says and opens his soda.

"How many sisters?" I ask opening mine and taking a sip, squirming in my seat, wishing he wasn't here so I could just press the cold bottle of soda to my sore pussy and hold it there. 

"Five" he says and I almost choke on my drink. He catches it. 

"Yeah." he says. 

"Is that why you don't...you know." I say. 

He shrugs. "I'd like to think even if I wasn't brought up with all females in the house, that i'd still think what they make you guys do is messed up." he says. I nod.

"I think you would be." I say and he looks at me. "A good guy I mean...you'd still be a good guy" I say. 

He gives a little smile. "Thanks" , he hands me my pizza box and he grabs his and I open it and my stomach rumbles. 

"I love their pizza" I say. 

"Me too, It's my favorite." He says lifting one of the heated up slices and taking a bite. I let out a tiny giggle when he realizes it's too hot and does that weird chew thing with his mouth open. 

"Hot" he says. 

I let out a full giggle. "Yeah, it usually is when it comes right out of an oven" I tease.

"Hey!" he says at my making fun of him, but laughs and then takes a drink of his soda. 

"So, are your sisters younger or older?" I ask Marcus as he braves another immediate bite. I laugh when he does the same open mouth chew.

"Four older, one younger" he says.

"And how old are you?" I ask. 

"19" he says. 

I nod because I know that means his other four sisters have already gone through the horror of their 18th birthday. 

"How old is the younger sister?" I ask.

He looks down and sighs slightly and gets quiet.

"Seventeen....eighteen next week." he says and just fiddles with the cardboard box. 

"I'm sorry." I say knowing why he's upset. 

"Thanks." he says. "But, why are YOU apologizing? You didn't create this world. This...this...law" he closes his box and I see the same anger in his face that I feel in my gut, in my heart, in my entire being. 

"Your other sisters...the older ones....are they....like me?" I ask, meaning did they escape the FFA draw. 

He shakes his head. "No." 

"Well that's good at least." I say. 

"You have any brothers or sisters?" he asks.

"Sister...older...she's got one of these awesome shiny bracelets too" I say sarcastically. He winces. 

"That really sucks." he says. 

I nod. "Yea" 

"Mom and dad?" he asks. 

I nod.

"Your dad must be pretty pissed." he says.

I shrug and slip back into the seat and I too fiddle with the cardboard of my box picking at the edges. 

"He's not thrilled. But also...not as pissed as I'd like him to be. Both of them are pretty...'this is the way it is, we have to do what we have to' about it" I say.

"That's awful" he says. 

I nod. 

"My dad..." I say picking harder at the box. 

Marcus doesn't say anything and waits for me to finish and I feel a lump form in my throat and my eyes threatening to fill with tears. I take a deep breath. 

"He....particpates....he..." I pause and take a deep breath. 

"He doesn't know that I know, but me and my sister both know...we're not sure if my mom knows." I say.

"Sounds like a fucking bastard." he says. 

I let out a tiny surprised laugh and look at him as my eyes water. "Yea, he is." 

"I hate this world." He says.

I nod and look back at my box, still picking. "Yeah..me too" I say. 

"My dad did too" he says. 

I look at him. 

"Did?" I ask.

He nods. "He died a few years ago."

"Sorry." I say.

"Why?" his brows furrow. "I'm not. Fuck him. Fuck anyone who does that shit. If I could , I would set that place on fire, all of them. Every single one. I hate being there, fucking listening to the sounds." He says his lips tighten. 

"As soon as I find a new job, I'm out." he says. 

I nod. 

"Well, I'm glad I met you before you left." I say and give a friendly half smile and he gives a full one. 

"Me too." he says.

"Wanna hang out at my place? My mom and younger sister will probably be there, but they're cool." he says.

I don't want to go home. So I nod.

-----

When we get to Marcus's house , he introduces me to his mom. Her presence is warm, kind, loving, caring.  

"Mom" Marcus says. "This is my friend-" he stops realizing I never gave him my actual name. 

"Hi, I'm Lela" I say and reach out my hand and forget, and hand her the one with my bracelet on it. She sees it and her face falls. 

"Child.." she says shaking her head and pulls me into a hug. 

I stand frozen for a moment as she squeezes me , not too hard, but her arms are around me. After a moment I lift my arms and wrap them around her, because she's more warm than my parents are, and a good fucking hugger and I needed it bad. 

"God will take care of those subjected to this, and punish those that support it come judgement day" she says as she pulls back and makes the sign of the cross and lifts the tiny gold crucifix on her necklace and kisses it. 

"Thank you" I say, even though I don't believe in God. Because I don't think a man meant to be a savior would allow the things that happen in this world. Just doesn't make sense to me. 

"We're just gonna hang out" Marcus says and his hands slips into mine. I look down at it and freeze for a moment, but then I clasp my fingers in his as he guides me out the back door and into their small back yard where a tiny little white dog is yipping and jumping at Marcus as he walks out.  He leans down and pets her and she wags her tail and we walk to an old swing set and we both sit on a swing. They're a little low and must have been for Marcus and his sisters when they were little. 

"It's a pretty name" he says , his sneaker kicks at the grass as his swing sways slightly. 

"thank you" I say looking at him and he turns his head and gives a little smile.

"I like your mom." I say. 

He smiles wider now. "Everyone does. Soon as they meet her." 

I nod. "I can see why, you're lucky" I say. 

He nods. "I am." he says. 

I rock back and forth in the swing. 

"So, you go to college?" I ask. 

"I do online." he says. 

I nod. "What are you studying for?"

"Politcal science degree" he say.

I nod and chew my lip. 

"What made you want to get into politics?" I ask. 

He looks at me. 

"My dad. And people like him. I can only do so much, to do more I'd have to make my way into a position of power, where I get to make a bigger difference." he says and I nod.

"Thank you." I say.

"For what?" he says looking at me as we sway our swings. 

"For fighting for what's right" I say. 

He gives a little smile. "Shouldn't thank someone for just being a decent human being." he says.

I shrug. "They shouldn't be so hard to come by either." I say. 

He gives a little laugh. "Aint that the truth." 

I turn and give his foot a little kick. He taps mine back and we smile at each other. 

"Thanks for this." I say. 

"You need to quit thanking me" he says and taps my foot again. 

"I just needed this. Needed a friend." I say. 

He smiles. "I know." he says and taps my foot again. I smile and hit his with the tip of my shoe. 

____

We sat in his backyard for hours talking about things, serious stuff, funny things that made us laugh, what we were into as far as music and movies and television. 

When the sun started to go down I felt my heart sink, meaning I'd have to go home soon. 

"You have to get home?" he asked. 

I nodded and sighed. 

I gave his mother a hug goodbye and met his sister on the way out, just as kind as her brother and mother.

Marcus drove me and pulled up to the end of my driveway.

"What are you doing tomorrow?" he asked. 

I looked at the floor. "I have to go back to the post" I say quietly. 

He reaches over and grabs my hand. I look at him. 

"You work tomorrow?" I ask. 

He nods.

"What time?" I ask.

"10 to 6" he says. 

"I have to be there for four hours" I say. "If I come at 2, can I come over to your house again afterwards?" I ask. 

He smiles and nods. "Of course." 

I smile and look at him. I like the way he smiles at me. I like the way he looks at me. It's nothing how those dirty men look at me and other girls. Marcus is actually a good person. Even if I just met him, I already know. 

"Thank you again for tonight..hanging out with me" I say. 

He smiles." Thank YOU, for hanging out with ME" he says. 

I give his hand a squeeze and he squeezes back.

"See you tomorrow" I say and slip my hand from his and open the door and get out.

"Gnight Lela" he says.

"Night" I smile and close the door of his car and walk to my house. He waits for me to get inside, and I turn and wave and watch him pull away. 

I sign onto the computer and log into my FFA page and double check how much time was tracked.  Four hours and thirteen minutes from today. I click out of the page and go to the local news page. 

I read the list of the new FFA's. Finding my name somewhere in the middle. I look at the rest of the name. Only recognizing one. I was friends with her in elementary school. Britney. Her parents were the type of religious people who believed God has a plan for us all, and if god decided you were to be a leg spreading servant to men. It was God's way of helping you build character, make you stronger. Britney believed the same back then, and I hoped for her sake she believed the same now, maybe it'd make the experience easier for her to deal with. 

I went up  stairs and peeled my dress off and took a shower. I was careful while cleaning my private area, because it hurt, and burned with soreness. Even the lightest touch caused discomfort. After my shower I put on a long night shirt and went down stairs. 

My mother and father in the living room, looking at me but not saying anything.  I walked to the kitchen , drank a glass of water, and then grabbed a bag of frozen peas. As I walked back through the living room they looked from the bag, to my bracelet to me. 

"You ok sweetheart?" My mom asked.

I scoffed.

"Peachy mother." I say and walk back upstairs, tears falling on the way. 

I lay in bed on my back and place the bag of peas on my pelvis and a little further down, I spread my legs and numb the pain with the frozen bag of peas. Keeping the fabric of my nightshirt between my skin and the bag. I wince, but soon the cold helps and relieves some of the pain. I fall asleep hoping that it won't hurt as bad in the morning, and hope for men who are more gentle tomorrow. I fall asleep with the bag of peas thawing between my legs.

_______________________________________