EroticReverie

*commissioned*

Stacy calls me back as my brother and I sit in the car quietly, both of us probably secretly hoping for our mistake of unprotected sex to be a lucky mistake.  

As much as I wanted a baby with him, no matter how wrong it was, I couldn’t get pregnant. Not now. Not when we’re living out of a car and estranged from our parents.

“Hello?” I answer my brothers phone.

“Meet me at the rental house.” She says.

“Oh..um how much do they want?” I ask.

“Just meet me there” she sighs and hangs up then a second later texts me the address even though I already know where it is.

Thirty minutes later were at the small house near the beach and Stacy is already there and already inside. The lights are on and I can see her moving about in the small living area.

“Should I wait here?” My brother asks and I shrug.

“No.” I decide. “Come on”

We exit the car and walk to the house and up the few small steps and then knock on the screen door, the main door already open.

“Yeah. Come in” Stacy says.

When I step in, I feel my heart stop.

She looks beautiful. Somehow more beautiful than I remember and it hasn’t even been that long since the last time I’d seen her.

“You look, good” I say and she sighs.

“Thanks” she says walking over and handing me the key to the house.

“You’re free to stay until someone rents it. So, don’t plan on staying too long, I’d try to line something else up as soon as possible” she says and her eyes go to my brother and then she turns and gestures around.

“Obviously my parents expect you to keep it clean and be respectful to the property.  To pay for any damages that would occur. There’s no cable or internet. If you want that, that’s on you. But electric and water is already on obviously she gestures to the lights. But try to reserve both as much as possible.” She says and turns and her eyes find mine and I’m just speechless.

“I….I don’t know what to say.” I say quietly.

“Usually one would say thank you” she says 

I give a small smile and look down a moment and then back up.

“Of course.  Thank you.” I say.

“Yeah. Thank you” my brother says and Stacy looks to him.

“I did this for her. Not for you.” She says and I can sense a bitterness towards him , as if she’s decided to blame him for our break up.  

My brother nods. “Regardless, I appreciate the help. We owe you.” He says and she scoffs.

“Yeah. Sure” she says and looks around.

“I left some soap and shampoo and toilet paper for you in the bathroom, and brought some groceries, it’s not much but I” 

She shuts up when I fly forward bursting into tears and wrap my arms around her.

“Thank you” I croak and hug her tight as she just stands there and then after a moment of me sobbing she wraps her arms around me.

“I’ll never let anything bad happen to you” she whispers and cry even harder and hold her tight , knowing I don’t deserve a damn thing from her, especially not this.

“I’m sorry” I cry and she sighs again and my brother stays quiet as I just stand there sobbing into my exes shoulder.

“Yeah. I know you are” she says gently and kisses the side of my head.

“You should stay, we can all have dinner together” my brother says and I pause and pull back and look at her already shaking her head.

“Please” I say and she stops her head and looks at me.

“I can’t” she says.

And I know what it really means.  That she can.  But won’t. Because it’s be too awkward, too hard, too sad.

“I miss you” I sniffle selfishly.

“Dont” she says “don’t do this” she says.

“I’m just…I just want to make sure you’re okay. Like I said stay as long as you need to for as long as we’re able to let you” she says and her hands reaches up and she touches my face gently and she swipes the streaming tears from my face.

“Your parents will come around” she says and I’m not sure I believe it but she seems to which give me a little bit of hope.

“This is wrong… you know it is…” she says and I look down.

“But youre their children. They’ll come to terms it with it. They love you both too much. I nod.

“I hope so.” I say and look at her , wanting to confess again that I still miss her, that I still love her. But knowing it’s not fair , to her or to my brother.

So I walk her out to her car leaving my brother inside.

“Thank you” I say again as she opens her door to her car.

“You’re welcome.  Just. I don’t know.” She sighs. “Take care of yourself I guess” she says.

“I just…” I say and trail off as she looks at me and I look into her eyes.

“I don’t deserve this.  And I know it’s selfish after what you’re already doing when you didn’t have to, and definitely didn’t deserve it. But… I need you to know you and me were real.  That I loved you. Still do. Always will. You’re my first true love. And…I’ll never forgive myself for hurting you like this.” I say and she takes a deep breath.

“I wish I could have been enough.” She says and my lower lip trembles.

“I don’t know how this happened.” I say.

“Me either” she says and looks down and reaches out and grabs my hand and then steps closer and her other lifts to my face.

“I know we were real.  I don’t doubt that. Because I feel it even now. I just wish things were different.  And I wish I could give you what you wanted. Let you have me and him as well. But I really don’t think I’m built that way.” She says and I nod and squeeze her hand.

“I do miss you too though.  So much” she says her voice threatening to crack.

“I miss laughing with you, I miss just being your best friend, and holding you” she says and a tear escapes me.

“I miss kissing you” she says and then she’s flush to me and her hand pulls my head forward and I inhale as she brings my mouth closer to hers and I can feel her breath on my lips, I can taste the sweetness of her mouth already and close my eyes.

“I wish you were mine” she whispers and I open my eyes.

“A part of me will always be yours whether you want it or not” I whisper back.

“I want all of you…not just a part of you” she says and before I can say another word, before I can close the gap between our mouths and taste her one more time, she’s stepping away , in her car and pulling away leaving me standing there frozen and guilt and confusion and every emotion rolls through me and I just want to collapse.

I wanted her. I still wanted her no matter how in love I was with my brother, no matter how much I wanted my life and future with him, I wanted her too.  

“Baby..” his voice comes from right behind me and I spin and look up at him as he looks down. Frowning when he sees the sadness in my face.

“It’s okay” he whispers and gently pulls me to him and holds me as I cry.

“It’s okay to still love her” he says.

“I’ll never fault you for loving her. She’s amazing” he says and I cry harder. Because he’s too perfect , too understanding and I don’t deserve either of their kindness and understanding.

“Do you know how many of my exes would help me out right now? None” he says.

“I have so much respect for her, for you and what you had with her, the feelings you still have. And maybe in time she’ll change her mind.” He says and I shake my head.

“But I’m yours” I say and he gives a small laugh.

“Yes.  You are. But no matter how much I selfishly want to have every piece of your heart , I’d be foolish to not know she’ll always have a part of it.” He says and clutch his shirt at his back and bury my face in his chest.

“Call her again in a few days, see if you two can talk…maybe” he says and I shake my head.

“She doesn’t want to share, I won’t ask her to again. It’s not fair.” I say and he strokes my hair.

“Okay” he says softly.

—-

Stacy left us with a few boxes of cereal, some deli meats and cheeses and bread with some condiments for sandwiches. And a dozen or so frozen dinners and a few gallons of cookie dough ice cream.  I almost cried again when I saw it in the freezer. Because it was my favorite.

We each chose a microwaveable frozen dinner and then ate it standing in the small kitchen instead of at the small table.

Afterwards we went to the small bedroom and then each of us took our own shower separately because the shower here was small and only enough room really for one.

We skipped clothes as we laid on the bed , tangled together , him holding me in his arms fully calmed down from my earlier breakdown.

I was still sad.  Over our parents.  Over Stacy. Over the fact that the guy I loved , I wasn’t supposed to.  

Letting it all fade from my mind I moved ontop of him slowly as I kissed him.  His hands slid up my back then down to my ass as I slid back and forth over his cock, rubbing myself against him, working us both up.

“Baby” he murmured.

“We-“ he started and I kissed him hard and reached down to his hard cock and lined him up with my center and sunk down on him slowly and moaned into his mouth as I felt every inch of him stretch and fill me so slowly.  It was agonizing.  How good he felt.  How something that was wrong could feel this right, this perfect.

“Baby” he groans as I start to move, slipping up and back down as I kiss him again to shut him up.

This was us. Messy.  Toxic. Mistakes upon mistakes.  And love. And fucking.  Unstoppable.

“You feel so amazing” he groans. “Everytime” he grunts and then he’s pulling me down and rolling us over.

I moan as he knees and grabs my hips pulling them into his lap.

“God you look like an angel” he groans as his eyes skim my naked body and my hair fanned out around me as I arch my back and grab his wrists as he holds my hips and I buck them as he fucks me hard and slow, each thrust a promise, each thrust so deep that I feel it everywhere and he threatens to push past my cervix.

“Baby” he groans.

“I love you” I moan.

He groans and goes a bit faster.

“I love you too baby” he groans as we look at one another.

“We’re gonna be good baby” he says and I moan.

“You and me, we’re gonna have it all” he says and I wince as his thrust slams into me.

“You’re mine” he says.

“And I’ll always take care of you” he groans.

“I need to have it all with you….I don’t care how wrong it is….I don’t fucking care…..I want us to have a family” he groans.

“I think about you pregnant all the time….even when we said we would never let it happen….I’ve wanted you to give me a baby since we started….it’s all I want baby…you….this….us….a family” he breathes heavily and I moan.  

“Me too” I whimper in confession.

“Baby” he groans.

“Are we doing this?” He groans.

I nod and grip his forearms.

“I’m done pretending that I don’t want it…I do….no matter how wrong….I want us to have a family, I want us to make our family….just like this….I want you to cum inside of me…I want you to make me have your baby”

It’s not the right time. It’s not the right anything. But I need it now more than ever. I need a family now that I don’t know if I’ll ever get my parents back.  And I want it with him.  I want to have not just one but many of his children.  I want us to live together and raise our children and not give a fuck about what’s wrong or right.

There’s nothing in the world I want or need more than this.  

And we’ll have it.  I know we will.

Nothing will stop us now.