EroticReverie

Annalise

I'm buzzed before me and Lizzie even leave the apartment. A small bottle of fire ball in one hand, my phone in the other , she drives us to the beach. 

I do a good job of pretending as we walk onto the beach that I'm not tense, that I'm not looking for him in the massive gathering of people. 

The bonfire party takes up a good half mile of the beach, there's one large fire, then a bunch of smaller ones  spaced out with groups sitting or standing around, while music plays from the center  near the taller fire. There's bikini clad girls and guys in swim trunks or board shorts dancing and making out, talking and drinking , laughing , running around, laying in the sand. 

Lizzie makes me dance with her, and I do without hesitation. Because I need to fake it. She came here to have a good time, not to watch me feel sorry for myself amongst strangers. 

I'm not really feeling it, but I keep dancing anyways as she grinds her body on mine, drawing the attention of a few guys. I ignore their blatant stares, and their remarks. 

"Do it with your tops off" 

"Touch her boobs!" 

Lizzie laughs and I just smile at her and let her eat up the attention. 

After one more song we make our way to one of the kegs and take a cup each and then walk around. I look casually around throughout the night, looking for anyone built like him. For anyone with that Charlie Hunnam look alike face, but I come up with nothing. 

It's midnight and I'm drunk. Im giggly. Yet sad. Laughing. Yet falling apart inside. I feel like I'm seconds away from reaching the point in the night where I sob fireball and beer tears. 

Lizzie is drunk and flirting with a guy as I wander away from her, I unscrew the cap on my little bottle of fire ball and take more sips I don't need. 

I giggle to myself when I almost fall over , a girl righting me with a laugh and asking if I'm okay and I nod without looking at her, and thank her and keep moving. A few steps later my eyes scan for him, my heart hurting, and the tears pricking behind my eyes. 

Why do I want him to be here so bad? What would I do other than stare at him or cry at his knees and beg for him  to forgive me. I didn't want to give him another shot, because I knew the secret I had would make it pointless. Not only because he hurt me, but because I didnt want to hurt him, and have him find out. And I blurted it out like an idiot WHILE fucking him. 

For some reason my eyes drift to the side as I walk past the large fire. 

Looking through it I see a flash of his face. Thinking that I'm just drunk I blink, because that face is staring right at me from further back on the beach. 

I freeze, I feel like I'm gonna cry. I know I'm going to cry. So i whip myself around and start to head back from the way I came in the opposite direction and bump into a wall. No. Not a wall. A man. A wall man. 

"sorry!" I squeak in surprise as he walks right into me too, and grabs me before I fall. 

"Whoa there" he says and rights me with his arms around me. 

"thanks" I say as I go to push out of his arms and laugh nervously, feeling dumb for crashing into a stranger. 

"You alright sweetheart?" he asks as he reaches up and pushes my hair back over my shoulder and his fingers take their opportunity to skim my shoulder, and when he brings his hand back from brushing my hair , he lets his finger trace the thin strap of my red bikini top on my shoulder. 

"You drink a bit too much honey?" he asks and I almost barf just from his pet names and the fact he gives them to strangers. 

His friends laugh as I just shake my head. 

"then maybe you should have some more" he says with a little laugh and holds up his cup of beer for me. 

"No thanks" I say still avoiding looking at him.

"You legal?" he asks. 

"Um..." I say and look at him. "What?" 

"Not for drinking." he winks. "Legal for some other kinds of fun." he says and his large body sweeps into mine and his hand goes behind my lower back. 

"I say you and I get wasted and fuck like porn stars in my truck" he says and his friends laugh. 

"Um no , that's ok" I say and try to slowly slip from his hold. 

"Oh come on, lighten up, have some fun with me" he says and his hand at my lower back slides down to my ass and I push my hands to his chest, as his friends just laugh beside him and nobody else seems to notice this guy groping me. I whimper and he chuckles.

"Dont be scared doll face, I don't bite." he says.

"You here with anyone?" he asks me and grabs my ass, squeezing it hard. 

"She's here with me. Get your fucking hands off her." 

My harasser turns toward his voice and I turn my head too and see Mal staring daggers at the guy who steps back. 

"My bad bro" he says. 

"She should have just said that in the first place" the guy throws his hands up and I watch as he attempts to surrender, but it's too late, cause Malcom throws his fist right into the guys nose. A sickening crunch noise is heard on impact as the guy howls and blood starts to gush from his nose as his friends curse and try to come after Mal, but there's already a group  of guys pushing themselves between Mal and the others. 

He snarls at the guys, then looks around to the side, then back to his other side where I stand and he looks at me and points a finger. 

"You."  "Car."  "Now." he commands and I watch him walk away from me and I stand there stunned. Blinking drunkenly, looking back to the bloody nosed pervert and his friends fuming and threatening to go after Malcom. All talk though, because nobody is holding them back now. 

"Annalise!" his voices booms through the air and it's some of the scariest fucking shit I've ever heard. I jump and turn. 

"Get over here!" he says, calling me like a fucking a dog.  Tail between my fucking legs, I obey. 

I stumble through the sand and once he sees I'm following him he turns and keeps walking. 

He's going so fast I can't even keep up and I fall once. Then another time as I try to get back up. 

I hear him huff and growl. 

"God damnit" I hear him mutter to himself and he walks back over , bends over, helping me up. 

"Tha-" 

I let out a tiny yelp when I'm scooped up honeymoon style and Malcom is carrying me to his car. 

I don't say a word, not a single fucking word as  he puts me into the car and tosses my cell phone into my lap. Which I don't even know where he got it or when I dropped it. 

"Hands Annalise" he says and I move my arm from the side of the door and he shuts it. 

I feel so confused, I feel sad, and scared. Not of him. But of the fact he'll never forgive me for what I did. How could he? 

My lip trembles as he opens the car door and gets inside.  My eyes go to his knuckles as he turns the key in his ignition. 

I don't ask where we are going, because I trust him. 

"Seatbelt." he says and I nod silently and my lip still quivers and I sniffle trying to hide the tears falling as I fumble with the seatbelt. The metal nose making the clacking sound against the lock and I can't get it in. I let out a tiny sound of frustration and he grumbles and reaches over and slides it right in and it clicks. 

"thank you" I say in a whisper as he throws the car into reverse, backing out of his spot and drives away from the beach. 

I grab my phone and type a drunk text to Lizzie.

"Left beavh , wih Malkim" my fingers hover, knowing I spelled shit wrong but I press send and then drop my phone into my lap and lay my head back as I start to get the spins. 

Malcom

I shouldnt give a shit about her. I shouldnt still fucking love her after what she did. But I wasn't a fucking asshole, I wasn't going to let her get groped by some fucking asshole just because I was angry with her. I wanted to hate her, god I wanted to fucking hate her. 

I look over as I drive, her eyes are closed and her head is wobbling and I heave a sigh and she lets out a little noise.

"please don't hate me" she whines quietly. 

I don't say anything. Big mistake, because my silence sends her into tears. 

"Mal" she cries. "don't hate me" she begs and I swallow hard, because fuck. How was it the sound of her being so fucking sad could still pull at my fucking heart like this, when I shouldnt fucking care!

"Just....just close your eyes and go to sleep." I say.

"Mal" she pleads and moves in her seat trying to adjust her seating.

"I was mad! I was so mad!" she cries and I take a deep breath. 

"I wanted to hate you! I wanted to hurt you!" she sobs. 

"I did the worst fucking thing possible, because I wanted you to hurt like me!" she admits. 

"But id take it back." she cries. "Id take it back Mal" she says and curls up with her back facing me lifting her feet to the seat and holding her legs to her as she cries. 

"i know you dont love me anymore" she says drunkenly , a blubbering mess. 

"I deserve it" she whimpers. "I deserve the worst." 

I just let her go on and on, she goes for minutes , then silence,  and then repeats her plea again. 

As we pull up outside her apartment building I get her out of the car and carry her into the  building , I take the elevator to her floor and then curse when I realize I don't have a key.

"Door mat" she mumbles and I set her down, propping her against the wall carefully as I lean over and flip up the little "Welcome Bitches" door mat and find a key.

"Annalise..you can not put a fucking key here." I tell her and she just sways against the wall. 

"where else am I gonna puddit?" she asks and I roll my eyes, but she doesnt see me because hers are closed as she almost falls over before I catch her. 

Opening the door I help her inside. 

"You don hafta stay" she says balancing up against the wall with her palms to it and her forehead against the wall. 

"Did you eat today?" I ask her. She nods.

"Chimis" she says and I hate that I find her abbreviation for her favorites foods adorable right now. 

"Lizzie took me shoppin" she tells me as I throw my arm around her and guide her into the kitchen where I sit her into a chair. 

"That was nice of her." I say as she then leans over and crosses her arms and rests her head on the table. 

"Do you think we would have gotten married?" she asks, making me stop in my tracks towards her fridge. 

I ignore the question. 

"Do you want toast?" I ask. "I can make you some uh... " I open the fridge and freeze. 

"Pizza?" I ask. 

"I think we would have gotten married Mal" she says and then gives a tiny little whimper and I realize she's crying again. 

"now you hate me" she cries and I rub my hands over my face before turning around. 

"Annalise...baby.." I say and hate how easily it slipped from my mouth. 

"Annalise, I need you to stop crying okay? You're going to get dehydrated. The more you cry, the more water I'm going to have to make you drink, ok?" I say gently like I'm talking to a child, and I stroke her hair and she sniffles. 

"i love you so much" her voice squeaks and cracks and I kiss her temple and say nothing and go back to the fridge. I make her toast with a little bit of butter and cinnamon and sugar. She used to make it for me all the time when we'd go to her house after school. 

I set the slices in front of her with a bottle of water with a straw and watch as she lifts her head. Her cheeks are tear stained and her eyelids are heavy and her eyes are puffy from crying. 

Unfortunately, she's still the most beautiful fucking thing I 've ever seen. It's maddening. 

"Drink some water" I remind her as I watch her house the first two slices of toast. 

"I saw Josh." she says and her eyes lift to me, her wet lashes blinking to try to open wider. 

"I didn't know he worked...at Rosalitas....saw him on the way out..." she says and I just look at her and nod to her water. 

'Drink your water Annalise." I tell her and she leans her mouth to the straw and sips and I watch her drink sip after sip. 

"I'm sorry" she says after she drink half. 

"Just finish your toast and your water." I say. 

"Mal" her voice creaks. 

I lift my eyes to her. 

"I ruined everything. I'm sorry" she says and I point to her toast. 

"Eat." 

----

I help her get to the bathroom so she can go pee and then brush her teeth which takes a lot longer than anticipated when she stops to cry every ten seconds. I help her rinse , holding her hair back as she spits and then take her to her room. 

"do you want pajamas?" I ask her as I help her sit on the bed. She shakes her head. 

"Do you still sleep without clothes on?" I ask. she nods. 

"help me" she says with a whimper. 

And I do. I remove her little red cover up dress, and then untie the front of her bikini top that tied in the middle and do my best not to look at her body, and she falls on her back, and I glimpse her tits bouncing on her chest as she just lays there as I help her take of the bikini bottoms. 

I look longer than I should at her body as she just lays there limp, her legs dangling over the edge of the bed. 

"this isn't fair" I whisper to myself, and let my eyes take her in, knowing it'll probably be the last time I ever see her. I swallow and my cock twitches and I shake my head as I look at her. 

I gently move her so her head is on her pillow and she just hums slightly already asleep. I cover her up, then walk to the other side of the room where there's an extra fuzzy blanket, and I grab a pillow from the dozen she has on her bed and lay it on the floor near her bed at the side. I walk over, click her light off and then walk back to her bed and lay down on the floor and pull the blanket up over me. 

"Yes." I whisper into the dark to myself, but answering her earlier question. "I would have married you Annalise."