EroticReverie

Bane

I sit there, stunned, shocked, speechless, was I losing my hearing, did I hear her right?

"Are you...are you sure?" I ask her, and maybe I'm stupid for giving her chance to change her mind, but I needed her to be sure. 

"No, I'm not sure." she says shaking her and looks at me. 

"But it's what I want to do this very second. So..." she shrugs. 

"since I dont know what the hell to do...I'm letting my stupid heart do what it wants, while my mind is cursing me for even letting you be here right now." she says and I nod. 

"Do you....are you...are you staying the night...do you need to grab anything?" I ask her and she lets out a little breath. 

"I'm not sure what I'm doing, all I know is, I don't want to look at this dining room everytime I come to visit my parents, and think of you." she says and fuck, that hurts to hear. But I get it. She doesn't want reminders of me here when we don't know what's going to happen. 

I nod. "Okay." 

---

We get in the car and I look at her as she puts her seat belt out and pulls her hair from behind her and over the front of her shoulder. 

"I was with Kevin and Aiden when you texted me." I tell her and she looks to me. 

"How are they?" she asks, a genuine small smile on her face. My friends were better to my girlfriend during that time than I was. And I know she appreciates them for it, loves them for it. While she hasn't talked to them for two years, only to Francis and her parents, I know and they know that it was necessary for her to cut us all off if she was truly trying to distance herself from me. 

"They're good. I mean...Aiden is marrying Francis , so obviously he's happier than a pig in shit right now." I say and she smiles.

"I'm so happy for them." she says and then looks down at her lap, twisting her fingers and I wonder if she's thinking the same thing I am. That if I hadn't fucked up, maybe it could have been us. That maybe her finger would have a nice pretty ring on it right now if it weren't for me. 

"I am too." I say. 

I start the car up and then look out the back window and before I put it in reverse.

"We don't have to go to my place Valentine. We can go anywhere." I say, because I was scared to bring her back to my house, and maybe for the same reason she didnt want me in hers. Because if she did, her smell would linger there, and even after it was gone I'd imagine in, and then even long after it was gone, I would search for it, crave it to come back. I'd see her face in every room, hear her voice. 

"Do you not want me in your house?" she asks. 

"If we're in my house...I'm going to try to kiss you." I say and she swallows and turns her head as I look at her for a reaction.

"Oh." she says and rubs her palms on her jeans. 

"So...where do you want to go then?" she asks. 

"Kevin and Aiden are probably still at the sports bar, we can drop buy, you can see them, have a drink with them." I say.

She nods. "Okay, yeah. I'd love to see them." 

I take out my phone and shoot off a text to my group chat with Aiden and Kevin.

"Bringing Valentina to the bar. Don't be dicks." I type and send it off.

"They'll be happy to see you." I tell her. 

She looks at me and smiles. "I miss them." 

"They miss you too." I say and then I back out of the driveway and drive to the bar. 

The ride is silent and I think I'm about to break off my steering wheel with the death grip I have on it. But thankfully were at the sports bar and park on the side of the building. 

I walk beside her, and push open the door and let her walk in and as we walk in , I look over to the high table in the middle of the bar that we were sitting at and I see Aiden's face light up first, a big fucking smile, and Kevin notices and looks towards the door. 

"THERES OUR GIRL!" Kevin yells and is out of his seat and it hurts to see the huge smile on Valentina's face, because I didn't get one. But it's a real smile, a big one, and she's laughing, and I might cry in the middle of this damn bar, because she's so fucking gorgeous, and her laugh , her real laugh is something I've missed so much. 

Valentina walks towards the table, around a group of people standing at the other and as soon as she near Kevin , she jumps into his arms, and my fucking heart feels someone is stabbing it, my stomach feels like I'm being punched in the gut. Im happy that theyre all happy to see each other, it's not that. It's fucking jealousy that I want her in my fucking arms like that. That it's my fault she's not. 

Kevin picks her up off the floor as she squeals with laughter and wraps her arms around his neck, hugging him tight. I watch his arms wrap around her back and the way he swings her around and then watch her head go back with a laugh and she kisses his cheek and he kisses hers as he sets her down, and then Aiden stands and takes his hug next. Obviously out of resepct for Francis, he doesnt lift her off the floor, or kiss her cheek even if it would only be platonic, but he hugs her tight in a bear hug, the way you'd hug a sister, or a family member and then he pulls back and cups her face. 

"Missed ya kid." he says and she swats his hands away. 

"We're the same age Aiden" she says with a roll of her eyes and he laughs and Kevin swings his arm over shoulder and pulls her in for another hug and she laughs and I'm finally at the table, taking my time getting over to them as Kevin squeezes her. 

"Alright." I say. Making everyone pause, and I lift my hand to my neck and rub it as I look away , knowing I don't get to monitor her fucking hugs with friends, that it makes me look crazy, thinking I have any right. 

Kevin withdrawls his arm from around her, and I feel like a dick when he gives her a pat on the shoulder, and she looks at me and presses her lips together and then just shakes her head dismissing my mini outburst of jealousy. She pushes up onto the stool and I take the one beside her as she sits across from Aiden, and between me and Kevin. 

They both have a ton of a questions for her right away. The New York bomb raises their eyebrows as much as it did mine and when they both look to me when they learn that information , I just avert my eyes to the television. They don't need to look at me to know I fucking hate the idea of Valentine being almost three thousand miles away. Whether she's my girl or not. 

She talks to them about school, about her part time job as a waitress, ask her about her new friends, she tells a few stories, tells Kevin she has a friend who is a female version of him and that they're probably soul mates. 

"I'm gonna have to come visit New York then, show her MY big apple." he says and Valentina just rolls her eyes as she laughs. 

"You haven't changed at all." she says and he smiles. 

"I'm a man, we mature slowly Valentina." he says with an unapologetic shrug. 

She only laughs and then she tells them about a few more people she met, some through school. She pulls out her phone, showing them pictures, and I take glances, and I take an extra long glance at a picture from a club or event , where she's standing next to some talk guy, who has his arm around her. He has his arm around another girl on the other side, but the picture makes me to fly to NY just tell him to keep his hands off her. I'm a fucking psycho I tell myself as I clear the mental image of punch the blonde hair blue eyed Romeo looking punk right in his shiny , clean shaven face. 

I avoid looking at the pictures, but I make sure to keep listening, not wanting to seem disinterested in her life. Because I missed two years of it. I wanted to know every single thing she did or saw while she was gone. 

She declines Kevin's offer to get her a drink, and says she just want's a Coke, then excuses herself to go to the bathroom. 

They both look at me the second she leaves the table. 

"You look like you're about to fight someone or throw up, or I dont know, pass out?" Aiden says. 

I bounce my leg, my foot moving up and down on the rung of the barstool. 

"I'm going fucking crazy." I say with a sigh and look towards the rest rooms and see her walk in. 

"What'd you talk to her about at her house?" Kevin asks. 

"I fucking...I had a god damn panic attack when I first got there." I say. "she had to fucking calm me down...then we ate after that." 

They look at me with cocked brows. "And?" they both say in unison. 

"And then I apologized, said what I've said through text and voicemails before, then, she just...i thought she wanted me to go, cause she wasnt really talking, so I got up, and then she told me to sit the fuck down that she had shit to say too." I say and see both of them grin. 

"Good for her." Aiden says and I glare at him. 

They were best friends, but if there were Team Bane and Team Valentina shirts, nobody, including them would be wearing mine. They loved me, I loved them. But we all loved Valentina, because she was a good fucking person. And I wasnt mad that they ultimately would side with her. 

"I don't know what to do." I say and put my head in my hands and groan and then lift my head up. 

"I basically laid all my cards out..told her I was all in. That i'd always be all fucking in with her. That I still loved her. That I wanted another chance." I say. 

"And?" Kevin asks. 

"And she said she missed me. That she still loved me. But that...you know..."I say and shrug. 

"The fact that we still love each other, doesnt mean were meant to be together I guess, or something..I dont know.. but we are...we fucking are." I say and Aiden reaches over and put a hand on my shoulder. 

"All you can do is listen to her man...and hear her." he says. 

"She told me to take her to my place, cause she didnt want the reminder of me in her parents home when she came to visit." I say. 

"Ouch. Unerstandable. But ouch." Kevin says and I nod. Looking back to the door and see Valentina walking back and make eye contact with her. She gives that ever so slight smile  and then looks down for the rest of her walk back. 

A half an hour later, Kevin and Aiden both give her another hug, Aiden needing to go home to Francis, and Kevin claiming he had a date with Pornhub, making Valentina scrunch her nose. 

"You're so gross" she laughs as she hugs him and they each give me a half hug and a slap on the back. 

"You don't get her back, I'm stealin her." Kevin says in my ear. 

My nostirls flare and he laughs. 

"Joking." he says. "Joking man." 

When they're both gone I look to Valentina sitting there sipping on the small straw of her coke and she looks at me, and I watch as she gently bites the straw and then I watch her eyes slip from my eyes to my mouth and back up. 

She sets down the empty drink.

I watch her lick her lips and then look at me again. 

"Where do we go now?" She asks.