EroticReverie

Daniella- Eight Days Later 

I sit at the opposite end of the row. Kendall in my lap as Lynn’s sister speaks to the room about fond memories of her sister. 

Carson doesn’t cry. He holds it together for the kids. Comforting them instead of letting himself grieve along with them. Kendall is really too young to understand the weight of what it all means. So I hold her in my lap the entire time as Carson loving consoles his children. My lower lip trembling as I feel their pain and their loss.  

I can feel it from the entire room. That Lynn was special. I had known that before now.  I’d seen the way she looked at her children. At Carson. She’d loved them with her entire heart. And I imagined she did the same with all the other people in the room who were holding back tears and sniffling. I watched as Carson stood and spoke about his wife. He spoke about her like she was a saint. And she was to him. He spoke about how much she loved her children. How much she loved him. And how he could never return that love as greatly as she did.  That she loved harder and fiercer than anyone else could. Maybe a small part of me was jealous of the great love he had for her. But it was only a very small part.  I was happy he’d had her. That they’d had the life together that they did. 

People might not think Carson deserved her 

But he did. Because whether he believed it or not. He loved his children as fiercely as Lynn did. He loved their life together. The time they had. He cherished it. Was grateful for it. Maybe we made a mistake of starting our relationship that day in the kitchen. Before she was truly gone. But he’d explained to me that he’d always love her. That knowing she was leaving him , had given him time to grieve before hand. So he could be there for the kids when she was truly gone. 

The burial was somber and I again stood in the front with Carson and the kids. 

The gathering at the house was more light hearted. Lynn would have wanted it to be. She wouldn’t want anyone to be sad. I knew that about her.  That she only wanted happiness for those she cared about. The guilt sat heavy on my chest. That I’d spent the last of her days making love to her husband at night in my room under her roof. Promising him a life with me. Starting to build a relationship with him and steal his kisses and his touches whenever I could.  

The kids are all outside , people making their way in and out as I keep replenishing the food and snacks. The drinks and try to keep myself busy so I don’t have to look her loved ones in the face. 

I notice Carson has disappeared and his mother mentions it to me. 

“Go” she says softly her eyes on me as if she can sense my worry. My wanting to run and find him.  As if she already knows what’s between us. 

I go upstairs and to their bedroom. The bedroom is be expected to share with him. Hopefully not tonight.  I didn’t feel right to sleep in her spot so soon. Which might seem ridiculous since I’d already been sleeping with him sexually. 

“Carson?” I ask softly as I open the door finding him sitting in the bed. Head in his hands and shoulders shaking, elbows to his knees. 

It stabs me in the heart. Punches me in the gut to see him crying like this. 

“Carson” I say softly and close the door behind me, locking it and walking over to him. 

“Hey” I say softly and I sit down next to him , my hand sliding up his back. Rubbing it gently and then taking one of his hand from his face and he lifts his tear soaked face and looks at me. 

“I’m sorry” he says apologetically.  As if he doesn’t deserve to mourn her. As If I’ll be upset that he’s hurting over another woman. 

“Carson” I shake my head. 

“Don’t be sorry. God. Please don’t be sorry for being mourning her.” I say and I grab his face with both hands.  

“She’s your wife. The love of your life.  I get it. And I don’t expect for you not grieve just because of what there is between us.” I say. 

“Id be upset if you didn’t mourn her.” I say. And it was the truth.  I wanted him to miss her freely. Still love her. I needed to know that he always would love her and always miss her. 

He leans in and kisses me and I don’t stop him. I don’t stop him as he reaches to the back of my black dress and unzips it and pulls my clothes off and then his own. 

I don’t stop him as he fucks his own pain away using me. The bed creaks as he thrusts. Fucking me hard and deep. Slow but forceful. Making hard love to me to make him forget his other other emotions as he focuses on just me. 

Im not sure that I should be letting him right now. If it’s a good idea for him to be fucking me in the bed he shared with her while the dirt is still fresh on her grave. But I don’t stop him. I let him have me. Whatever he needs. I’ll give it to him. 

My legs and arms are around him. Holding on as he thrusts even harder and I gasp and my back arches and I cry out his name as he makes me cum. My cunt pulsing on his cock as he keeps driving into me. His breath heavy and hard and he pulls out , flipping me over and grabbing my arms.  Pinning them as he thrusts into me as I lay on my belly. 

He drives harder and harder. The bed banging against the wall and I wonder if anyone can hear it over the loud chatter downstairs but I don’t tell him to stop. 

He fucks me and fucks me.  Flipping me back over and sliding back into me. Rolling over with me ontop and I ride him. 

I fuck him like he needs. Hard and fast. Bouncing on his cock and scratching my nails down his chest and he holds my hips.

His hands go to my breasts and he lifts his head as I lean forward and let him suck them. His mouth capturing my nipple with a groan and then the other as I gasp and pant as he pulls me down to him his arms right around me as his hips thrust viciously up into me. 

I cry his name quietly as he fucks me like this. Holding me to him tight.  His cock sliding in and out of me. 

“All I want to do is fuck you and make love to you” he groans. 

“You’re all I want right now” he says. 

“You make me forget anything bad when I’m inside you” he groans. 

“Nothing else matter when I’m inside you” he says and I moan. 

“I’ll take care of you Carson, I promise, anytime you’re sad. I’ll make you feel better. I promise” I gasp as he delivers a hard thrust 

His hips jerking as he gums and fills me with cum. The warm liquid filling my insides and then he slowly and I lay over him. I kiss his neck as he rubs my back. His cock still inside of me. And then he’s rolling us over and his thrusts start again. 

“Oh god” I moan as I feel his cock still hard as it’s ever been beat into me, thrusting hard and fast.  Bouncing me against the bed with each thrust. My breasts bouncing. My hands flying to the headboard to keep him from fucking me up into it. 

We look at each other. Hungry and panting and he groans and grunts. Fucking me relentlessly. 

We hadn’t said the words yet. Just promises that we would fall into it. But I could feel his love for me with each breath he breathed. His eyes searing into mine and his cock promising me that this was us. Forever.