EroticReverie

Tobias

Did I want Hadley? Did I want to keep touching her and finally have her the way of always dreamed about?  The way I always thought of her growing up? Yes. Fuck yes.  But a night of sex wouldn’t fix what was broken inside her or between us.  I didn’t want her to make a mistake with me, god I couldn’t fucking live with myself if she saw being with me intimately as a mistake. There was no question about me wanting her. Loving her. She knew it. I knew. The guys knew it too.  Even her mother knew it. But I’d never tell Hadley that. The words her mother had said to me weeks before she passed away. How even if I didn’t love Hadley , I’d made her mother a promise that I’d take care of her. That her mother told me her daughter was special, and that she could tell I knew just how special she was. That one day Hadley would see how special I was too.  I could only hope. 

But I wasn’t sure Hadley loved me the way I loved her. Otherwise she’d had never pushed me away like she did. Or maybe she was , and had her reasons. I wasn’t sure. And that terrified me. Because I was sure that Hadley would be the only woman I’d ever love the way I loved her. 

That’s why i couldn’t go there with her last night. I couldn’t let myself have something I wanted only to have it run away the next day. Which is exactly what she did. 

When I woke up. Hadley was gone. Her fishnets left on the floor of my guest bedroom and her skirt gone. Her boots no longer by the front door. 

I spent the next three days calling her. Texting her. Showing up at her apartment that I hadn’t been to in years.  No sign of her. 

“Quit doing this man” my brother Oliver says as we sit outside my house. Him , Atlas and Sonny all sitting with me as I all but rip my hair out trying to figure out where the fuck she is. 

“Quit chasing her. It’s not worth it” my brother says and I just shake my head and grit my teeth. She was worth it. She was so fucking worth it and they just didn’t understand. They didnt understand the fucking hell that it was to watch a girl I fucking loved ruin herself. For them she was a friend.  A sister. For me she was so much fucking more. And after her coming to my door in tears and getting into bed with me.  Making me put my hands on her.  I knew she needed me. Not just for sex. But she needed someone to be there for her. To pull her out of the fucking hole she was in. 

“Shit” Atlas says as he sits up straight and we all look at him as he looks at his phone. 

“What?” Sonny asks and leans over and I see his eyes widen. 

Both of their faces look to me and I look to Oliver and then back to them. 

“What?” I say as I stand and walk over to where he’s sitting and take his phone. 

I feel my blood pressure skyrocket as I look at the paparazzi shot of Hadley inside a club, topless , her tits blurred out from an edit of the photograph. 

“Son of a fucking bitch!” I yell and throw the phone. Smashing it at the ground. 

“FUCK!” I yell and storm inside finding my keys the guys moving after me. Atlas

Not giving me shit for smashing his phone to bits. 

I can hear them explaining to Oliver the photograph when he tries to figure out why I’m flying off the handle.

“At the club…with Abel” I hear Sonny whisper and Oliver curses. 

“Chill out, wait a fucking minute, where are you going?” He yells and runs up to me snatching my keys. 

“To fucking get her!” I yell. 

“You don’t know where she even is! And you’re not fucking driving when you’re this pissed off!” He yells at me as I go for my keys. 

“So I’ll fucking find her!” I yell and he shakes his head. 

“Let her fuckin go!” He yells back. “She doesn’t fucking want you man! Quit letting her fuck up your life! You need to fucking let her make her mistakes!” oliver yells and I swing , landing a punch on his face. Atlas and Sonny jumping in between us. Both holding me back as my brother holds his jaw and looks at me. 

“Fuck you” he says and whips my keys at me. 

“Go fucking find your coked up dream girl sitting on another man’s dick, fuck if I care” he says and turns as I lunge for him Atlas and Sonny hold me back as I grunt , and try to break out of their hold.  

“Have fun chasing her for the rest of your fucking life!” He yells and I struggle still as he slams the door and peels out of my driveway seconds later. 

“Calm the fuck down man. We will help you find her. But fuck. You have to calm down” atlas says and I break down.  Tears of anger of fear of where she is and what she’s doing and what the fuck Abel is doing to her. 

“She’ll probably be at that fucking party for the record release , they’re having it at that club , we’ll find her there , alright ?” Sonny says and rip out of their hold. Both of them cursing and following me out the door. 

“My car.  You’re not fucking driving” Atlas says and I take the fucking offer because I wasn’t sure I could not drive like a fucking maniac. 

I had to fucking get to her.  And do what? Beg her to come with me? Apologize for turning her down? Is that why she left? Would she have went back to him if I had just given in and had sex with her? My leg is bouncing and I fly out of the car and through the front doors of the club with both of my friends on my tail as I start to look around the club. All the famous faces. The clearly high and drunk faces of celebrities and rich people that want to be their friends. 

“Where is she?” I growl to my friends as they help me scan the club. We spot Atlas and Sonny’s dads and Trey , Hadleys dad sitting in a private booth with a bunch a few female actresses by their sides taking shots and laughing. 

Immediately I go over to their booth and Hadleys dad looks up at me. The others looking up too. 

“Where is she?” I ask nostrils flaring. 

“You probably shouldn’t be here” Trey says. 

“Where the FUCK is HADLEY?!” I yell causing a scene and not caring. 

The three of my dads band mates look at one another and then look away at anything but me. 

“Where the hell is she?!” I yell and grab his bottle of beer and smash it on the table. Taking the broken bottle to his neck. 

“Whoa!” He throws his hands up as I threaten him the women in the booth screaming and the sound in the club going softer as everyone looks on. The music playing loudly but all talking stops. 

“She’s upstairs” he says. And I draw my hand back and throw the bottle down on the ground. 

“Shit” Atlas says as I storm away. Pushing through people. 

“You don’t want to go up there!” Her father yells at me. 

Atlas and Sonny run up the stairs with me to private room with the one way windows looking out onto the club. 

I turn the handle on the door to find it locked and start pounding on the fucking door.