Shay Adaway...Three Months Later...
He'd unfollowed me on all my accounts. Good. He'd stopped calling and texting. Good. He was leaving alone. Good. Good. Good. Good. Until it wasn't. Until a week had gone by without his annoying flirty texts. Which I realize weren't annoying at all, and that I missed them. But, I was exactly what he said I was. Stubborn. If he thought I would come to HIM, he was wrong. It was better this way, I told myself as a second week had gone by without any contact. He simply wanted what he couldn't have, and look at how easily he'd given up. He couldn't have possibly wanted me that bad, I tell myself. I didn't want his persistence. I lie to myself. I'd liked his persistence. Would I have liked it for other guys? No. But i'd liked his, because I'd WANTED him to persue me. I'd liked his attention. I'd liked..him. But that doesnt matter because he'd just hurt me. Eventually. It was better to keep going like I was. To have sex. And only let it be sex and nothing more.
The problem was. Sex wasn't fun anymore. Because the few guys I've hooked up with since weren't even close being sexually compatible with me. At least, not like Killian had been. I craved his hands grabbing and slapping my ass. Craved his dirty talk while drilling inside of me. Craved slapping his face and choking him while fucking riding him. He let me be as wild and rough with him as I wanted, and he gave it right back. He fucked me like it was his lifes purpose. God damnit.
I've avoided the club I ran into him at, because I knew he frequented it, when I'd ran into him there the second time. But now, here I was. In the club, secretly hoping to see him. God, I was pathetic.
I dance with my friends, flirt with guys, and eventually, mostly forget all about Killian. I stop looking around the club ever single minute and have enough drinks in me to just let loose and enjoy the night. I tug down on my white mini dress as I yell over the music to my friends that I'm going to the bathroom.
I make drunk girl talk in the bathroom, me and a group of other drunk women complimenting one another and giving advice to another girl who's crying in the restroom. Drunk girls in the bathroom are my favorite. I loved how you walk in that restroom door, and it's just an unspoken rule that everyone inside is now besties. Everyones a girls girl in the restroom. After several minutes , I make my way out of the restroom and head over to the bar.
I wait patiently, shaking my ass a little to the music as I watch the bartenders assisnt all the other customers. I lean over the counter, shouting my order to the bartender as she approaches and sets down a glass for me. Vodka cran. I pinch my brows and point.
"I didnt order this" I say, even though that's exactly what I was going to order.
She tilts her head to the other end of the bar. My eyes searching.
"He did." She says and walks away, my eyes landing on him. Motherfucker. Killian is smirking slightly , but he's not even looking at me. The woman he's with however, is GLARING at me. He grabs her chin and turns her face back to him and dips down and kisses her. My jaw clenches and my nostrils flare. I think about rejecting the drink as I watch him keep pecking her mouth. My nose twitches and I realize I'm fucking snarling. Drinks are expensive though. So I pick up the glass and walk right over to him. Bad idea. But good ideas aren't had when you're five drinks in at the club and the guy you've been secretly obsessing over for the past three months is there with another girl reminding you of what you threw away. Is it my fault? Oh most definitely. But drunk me doesn't care. Drunk me isn't logical. Hell, even sober me isn't anything other than crazy and stubborn.
He doesn't look at me, the girl does though. She rolls her eyes and lifts her chin and then grabs Killian's neck and shoves her tongue into his mouth.
The girls finally stops slobbering all over his mouth and then looks at me smugly. I roll my eyes and hold out the drink to her. She eyes it, Killian kisses on her neck, and I roll my eyes as he still avoids me.
"Sending me a drink, then ignoring me. Really mature you jackass." I hiss at him and see him smirking as he keeps kissing on the girls neck.
"Let's go babe" he says to her. My nostrils flaring as he grabs her jaw and licks her mouth and shoves his tongue into her mouth and I watch him walk away with her. What was the fucking point of that? What a dick! I slam the drink down on the counter, deciding I'm done with this night. Tears burn in my eyes and they fall as I make my way out the other entrance to the club. My apartment wasn't too far, I'd just walk back. Punish myself for being drunk and stupid and coming here. I wasnt sure if Iw as crying because I was pissed, or because I was hurt , or because I was sad. Or just over emotional and drunk right now.
I'm sniffling, wiping my cheeks as I growl at myself , hating that I'm fucking crying. Knowing it's because of him. Because I missed him, and I had no reason to be upset. Because I was the one that pushed him away in that arguement. It was my fault that some other girl was going to be having the best sex of her life tonight with Killian.
I take my phone out of my little purse and sit on a bench sniffling as I pull open the uber app and request a ride.
"Dont even think about it motherfucker" I say as guys shoes stop in front of me. My head down looking at my phone. I didn't want to be fucking hit on right now. I swipe angrily at the tears still streaming from my eyes.
"Are you crying?" he asks. My head shooting up at the sound of his voice. My brows pinch and I scowl.
"Fuck off." I bite out , staring up at Killian.
I go to stand up and he crowds me.
"Shay" he says and reaches for my arm and I jerk it back.
"I didnt mean to make you cry." He says and I huff.
"Bullshit. You wanted to be an asshole. Mission accomplished. You're a fucking asshole." I say angrily and he just frowns.
"you wanted to punish me. and you did. good for you. I hope you feel better now." I say and turn from him.
"I dont...that's not what..."
"Dont fucking lie!" I yell at him and turn and shove his chest.
"you wanted to hurt my feelings, wanted me to see you, with HER, with someone else!" I yell at him.
"I...honestly...didn't think you'd even give a shit... I dont know why I sent the drink over...I just saw you...and...yeah, I wanted to piss you off....but not...like this...I didnt want to make you cry Shay" he says and then steps to me and I back up.
"I'm sorry, please stop crying"
"Dont fucking tell me what to do!" I yell at him and he smiles slightly, his hands reaching up to my face and I shake myhead but he slips his hands back and his fingers push into my hair, he tilts my head back to look up at him.
"Okay.. I won't...you tell me what to do then..." he says. "hmm, tell me, tell me what to do with you baby" he says and I whimper and shake my head.
"dont call me that" I say and he dips his head down and sighs, pressing his forehead to mine.
"wheres your girlfriend?" I ask with an attitude and he hums.
"Dont got one" he says.
"the girl you were with" I say.
"A friend." he says.
"one you sleep with ?" I ask.
"What's it to you baby?" he asks and I look up at him.
"Nothing. It's nothing to me." I say and he smiles softly.
"If you say so" he says and then hovers his mouth over mine.
"it's a real dick move to ditch your date" I say and sniffle.
"She's just a friend...and she's on her way home...to her girlfriend..." he says.
"what?" I ask, my brows pinching.
"Her name is Lindsey...and she's a good friend...knows about you....it was her idea to send the drink when i saw you...her idea to make you jealous....were you jealous baby?" he whispers and I shake my head. Fucking Lindsey. I hated her.
"no" I answer.
"no hmm?" he asks and his lips brush mine barely as I breathe and shake my head again.
"I was mad" I say.
"why baby?" he asks and he licks his lips and i feel his tongue graze my lower lip slightly and I whimper.
"dont call me that, i told you not to call me that" I say.
"dont tell me what to do" he says and I huff and he smiles, his lips curving and he presses his mouth to mine. My hands grabbing at his shirt, clutching it, my toes pushing at the ground in my heels and my stupid hands lift up around his neck, my body to his as his arms slip around me, one hand on my ass, the other on my back as he groans into my mouth.
"fuck i've fucking missed you" he exhales on my lips and mine are still assaulting him with kisses.
His hand squeezes my ass and I moan into his mouth.
"I havent stopped fucking thinking about you, not for a fucking second, god I fucking miss you so much" he groans and then grabs my hair and pulls it back and looks down at me, my mouth parted and my eyes dazed.
"I know you're drunk...but I want to fuck you." he growls.
I nod. "Yes, yes, god, please, yes" I pant.
"you want to get fucked baby?" he asks, clutching my hair tighter and I moan.
"Say it" he growls.
"I want to get fucked" I whine, a coupe laughing as they pass us, but I dont care.
"Your place is closer" he says. "Let's fucking go."