EroticReverie

Katarina Karr

My heart pounds in my chest as the music stops and I stay clutched in the passionate grip of my partner Dimitri Koslov. I can feel his heart beating just as fast as mine as the stands errupt in deafening applause and cheers. Both of us with our eyes locked on each other, fighting our smiles for one second longer, drawing out the well practice performative passion that we were favored for. 

Will they or won't they, that's what all of our fans , and spectators and reporters always wanted to know. Have they? Do they? How can they not when they skate like that together? 

If you ask me, adults speculating over whether or not, I seventeen years old, and Dimitri, nineteen , we're screwing, was concerning. Of course they never said "screwing", that would be far too classless, but they never hesitated to question our "Romantic relationship", if there was one.

I've been skating with Dimitri since I was twelve and he was fourteen. But we've both been on ice since we knew how to walk. Our mother best friends, competitive with one another all throughout their careers in the figure skating world. So of course, their children had to take after them. But I didnt mind, I loved it. So does Dimitri. When I was fourteen, my mother died in a plane crash, Anna and Dimitri were my god parents, and they became my guardians after that, due to the fact my grandparents both died when I was young, and I had no idea who was my father was. The public loved a good tragedy, especially when it brought two young hopefuls even closer together. 

Dimitris intensity slips just enough to allow him to smile at me, both of us panting on one another. Sweat drips from his hair line as he cups my face, and silences the whole arena for the briefest moment. Before the errupt into cheers all over again as he presses his forehead to mine, and I give the slightest nod. His lips, crushing mine. 

I lift my white mesh covered arms, decorated in specs of glitter and rhinestone, wrapping them around his neck, laughing against his mouth, kissing him again. Then his mouth pecking mine again. I wasn't sure if I was in love with Dimitri, but I do know that I love him. 

We don't even have to look at our scores to know we beat the others, but we skate to the side, stepping out, our coaches, Dimitri's parents both there. His mother Anna, grabbing his jacket, putting it over his shoulders, and his father Anton, sliding mine over my shoulder and turning me around and crushing me in a hug, holding me tight as Anna kisses her sons cheek. 

I wrap my arms around Anton, squeezing my eyes shut, a big smile on my face. Then he's letting go of me, so he can clap Dimitri on the back while Anna grabs my hands and squeezes them with a smile on her face. 

I sit down, me and Dimitri holding hands, and they start to show our scores. The crows cheers as we get nearly perfect scores. We were going to the Olympics. Karr and Kozlov. America's Ice Sweethearts. We were going to the fucking Olympics. Tears stream down my face and I let Dimitri hug me so hard I can't breathe, but it doesnt matter, because I can't breathe anyways. All I can think about it, is how I wish my mother were here to see it. 

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We fly back to L.A early in the morning, and even though Anton and Anna sprung for me and Dimitri to have seperate rooms at the hotel, of course we didn't use them both. So we stay up all night celebrating, by way of swollen lips from making out , and body parts rubbed raw through our bodies grinding and chafing against one another for too long. 

Were me and Dimitri a couple? No. Did we act like it at times? Yes. This is as far as our intimacy went, making out, groping, dry humping. 

"Katerina" he groans as I kiss on his neck, his hands over my t shirt, on my breasts. "Please Katerina" he begs as he slides his hands down my sides, and goes for the hem of my shirt. I know he expects me to tell him no, like I always do. He only every asks once, and I say no, and then we continue to carry on with making out. 

"okay" I breathe as I lift my head and see the shock in his eyes.

"Okay?" he asks and I feel my lips pull slightly and I nod. 

"yeah, okay" I say softly and then sit up as I straddle him and grab my shirt and lift it. It was an old Ice Stars t shirt that was my mothers, that I always wore to bed. 

"Katerina" he groans, as I show him my bare chest for the first time. He acts like I've just shown him the treasure of a long lost sunken ship. My breasts were small, barely a b cup, but his hands slip up over them and then back down and I shiver at the way his palms and fingers feel as they drag over my nipples. 

I knew better than to let it get this far, this was the worst idea, for many reasons. Reasons I couldnt even begin to tell Dimitri. It wasnt fair to Dimitri to do this with him. While I may not be in love with him, I know he's in love with me. 

Within minutes, I know what his mouth feels like on my breasts, on my stomach. I know they way his fingers feel skimming my legs as he slowly slides off my shorts and panties. I know what his tongue feels like between my legs. Then I know how beautiful he looks naked, his toned, slim figure, every muscle on display, including the one throbbing between his legs, and I know what it feels like , as it throbs inside of me. 

He thinks it's my first time. It's not. But I let him think that it is , because he's so gentle with me, so sweet, he goes soft and slow. And know I know what it feels like to have a man that truly loves me, make love to me. It's good, so good. Beautiful even. The shared panting kisses, his soft whispers of how beautiful I am, how perfect I am, how much he loves me. I tell him I love him too. It's not a lie. I do love him. I just wish I could love him the way that I should. I wish things were different, I wish I wasn't already in love with someone else.