EroticReverie

Lela …the next day

I disassociate as a twenty something year old overweight man fucks me and calls me every name in the book. 

He smells. He sweats all over me. All over the bed. The plastic sheets are slimey and wet with his sweat. My body being slid back and forth as his small dick fuck my pussy from behind.  His stomach resting on my ass as he grabs my hips and tries to get deeper than his rapist two inch dick will allow him. I can’t even feel him. I guess that’s a mercy. 

Marcus hasn’t come by. Hasn’t come to the post. Hasn’t tried to come to my house. My father is right. Why would he after what my father made me do in front of him?

The sweaty man finishes. I just lay there. Waiting for him to leave before gathering my clothes and finding the bathroom where I can “freshen” up.  It doesn’t matter if I cry or don’t. There’s always some sick fuck that will prefer one or the other. There’s no escape. I’ll always be some perverts cup of tea. 

I let my tears fall as I go pee and then wash between my legs. I have to fight not to scrub it raw each time. Because I can never get clean. I’ll never be clean ever again. My tears slip off my cheeks and onto the tiles of the small dingy bathroom floor. 

I pull on the sundress , the left strap dangles. Torn from the first man that used me today. I sniffle and make my tears stop. I splash water on my face. Refusing to look myself in the mirror.  I can’t. I don’t want to. I haven’t been able to since yesterday. Can’t stand to look at myself , knowing that not only did I cum for my father yesterday after he made Marcus watch. But I’d cum again that night. This morning too. 

Because when he’s not being rough, it’s not…so bad. The tears threaten to slip as I admit it to myself. That I’m exactly what the world has intended me to be. A fucking whore. 

I walk back out of the post. My day finally over and find Marcus. Standing there against his car. My lower lip trembles. The tears don’t just threaten. They burst and cascade down my cheeks.  

“You free doll?” One guys asks. 

“Course she is.” Another chuckles but then Marcus is there pulling me into his arms. 

“She’s not.” He says and the guys mutter some bullshit as I cling to him. Burying my face in his chest as I cry. 

“Bad day honey? I’ll make it better” one guys asks says and grabs my ass 

“GET YOUR FUCKING HANDS OFF HER” Marcus snarls and the guys mutter laughs as Marcus pulls me towards his car and opens the passenger door as I sob. He shuts the door and gets in the other side. 

He starts up the car and drives. Not towards my house. Not towards his. 

“Where are we going?” I ask and he shakes his head. 

“I don’t know. Anywhere.” He says breathing hard. Angrily. But I know it’s not anger for me. So I’m not scared. 

Twenty minutes later we’re parked on a back road next to large sprawling fields with tall grass and he gets out and opens my door. Taking my hand. We walk through the tall grasses towards a large tree. The sun beating in on my skin and the breeze blowing my dress and then he pulls me to the ground. Sitting sideways in his lap with my ass on the ground between his legs. And just holds me. 

I’m crying again. Wordlessly sobbing as he strokes my hair. My back. My arm. He doesn’t hush me or try to make me stop crying. He just lets me cry. I don’t even know for how long. I’m hiccuping. Choking on tears and wiping my nose with the back of my hand as he holds me .

He lays us down in the grass as I calm down a little, under the tree and I lay my head on his chest as I sniffle. 

“I’m sorry” I finally speak. 

“You have nothing to be sorry for.” He says softly. And his fingers brush the little hairs along the side of my face and tucks them gently behind my ear. 

“I’m sorry for yesterday” I say. 

“Stop apologizing to me, please don’t apologize to me, I’m not them. I’ll never be them. None of this is your fault. You have nothing to be sorry for” he says and my lip trembles. 

What made people evil? What made them good? Was it a choice we made? Circumstances in life? Past events? Why were some people so bad, and some people were so good? What made my father and the men that utilizes FFA’s the way they were? And what made Marcus a young boy, more of a man than they’d ever be? 

“I wish I could run away with you. Take you away from it all.” He says and I know we’re both looking at the unbreakable tracker. Knowing somewhere in some office , someone knows where I am by just entering my name and number into a system. That tampering with the bracelet is impossible and punishable by law. I’ve heard different stories. That you’re allowed so many tamper strikes before you’re forced into serving more hours. And I’ve heard other stories where it only takes one strike. That the second it’s tampered with , the agency is already sending multiple enforcers to your gps location. There’s no running. There’s no taking me away from it all and we both know it. We both know the consequences. How those who break the FFA laws with such extremes as to try and run, sometimes don’t get more time. They just disappear. I’m not sure what’s worse. Dying to get away. Or dying inside each day being forced to submit yourself to even more of becoming less human. 

“If you want me to. We can. I’d try to.” He whispers. I shake my head. Because I couldn’t ask him to risk himself for me. And wasn’t sure I wanted to risk myself either. I didn’t know what to do, what I wanted. 

“I should get home soon.” I say quietly. Even though I don’t want to leave. The comfort of being in the middle of this field with nobody around to hurt me is too nice. It’s not fair. I want to stay here forever being held by the only decent guy I know. More than decent. 

“Just a few more minutes.” He says and I nod. His hand gently grabbing my chin and I slip up further as he moves onto his side and we stare at one another. 

“When it’s all over…I’ll take you away from here. We’ll go anywhere you want. Anywhere else in the world.” He says. 

“That’s along time” I say. 

“I’ll wait for you.” He says. 

“Why?” I ask and shake my head slightly. 

“Because I want to be the one that puts you back together when the world breaks you.” He says and I swallow a lump in my throat. 

“You already do. You’re doing it now.” I say and he smiles softly. 

“And I want to keep doing it.” He says. 

“You’ll still want me even after years of-“

“Yes” he says and I feel my lip tremble. 

Because what if I became too broken? What if I ended up becoming too lost? What if my father turns me into something I don’t want to be? What if Marcus learns how hard I cum when my father is “nice” to me while he uses me? 

“It’s not your fault.” He whispers. And I don’t know if he’s reading my mind. But clearly he sees all the worry in my mind. 

“It’ll never be your fault.  Just promise me when it’s over that you’ll let me take you away from here.” He says and I nod. Swallowing hard . He exhales. 

“Can I kiss you?” He whispers and my eyes water as I nod. I wasn’t sure why he wanted to. But I would never tell him no. 

Our lips touch, and my mouth moves slowly over his gentle lips. Pressing to them for some kind of salvation and escape from the world. 

His hand stays on my face as our mouths keep kissing in soft brushes of our lips. He groans softly. So quietly and it’s the first groan I’ve heard that doesn’t disgust me or terrify me.  Because it’s him. Not some monster that seems my body their property. 

I part my mouth slightly, my tongue slipping past my mouth and into his and he meets mine with his. He pushes his tongue against my gently and his hand slides from my face to my neck. His thumb stroking my neck and then his fingers are in my hair and our kiss grows deeper. Minutes go by. Each one a consequence as we lay there making out like young lovers should. And it feels like nothing bad can touch me. Even if it’s just in this moment. 

He groans again and I then I exhale with a tiny moan of my own and he gently clutches my hair as he lets his forearm against my upper back pull me closer to him. My hands on his chest. Clutching to him like a lifeline even if I know he can’t truly save me. 

My body aches and burns for what he could do to me. The way he could do what those men do to me , but he’d do it lovingly. Not because he could. But because I wanted him to.  

“Marcus” I moan on his mouth and he groans. 

“Shh” he whispers with a shake of his head as if he knows exactly what I’m asking for. 

I don’t push. I don’t plead his name again. I just kiss him. My pussy growing wet and begging for someone to treat it right. Begging for him. 

“Youre so beautiful” he whispers on my mouth and then kisses my cheek. 

Then it’s over. He’s pulling away and standing and taking my hands to help me up. Reality crashing back in as I realize I need to go back home. 

“Thank you” I say as I look down at the groan and he gently pulls me into his embrace. 

“Do you want to do this again tomorrow?”

He asks and I nod. 

“I’ll pick you up again tomorrow.” He says and I nod and we walk back to the car. 

We drive back. My hand in his. I fidget slightly , knowing my father will be waiting for me. Angry with me for making him wait. I’ll probably get smacked. Raped hard and punished for not coming straight home. 

Marcus strokes the back of my hand with his thumb. 

“It’ll be okay. I’m going to take you away , remember?” He says softly as he pulls to side of the road ,a few blocks from my house and I nod. 

“Yeah.” I say. Forcing a small smile and I lean over. He kisses me softly and then lift his hand to my face. 

“I’ll see you tomorrow.”  He says quietly and I nod. 

“Okay.” I speak softly. 

He kisses me once more and then I get out of the car. He watches me walk down the street and I look back to him sitting in the car as I round the corner. 

I smile and see his head nod with a smile and his hand lift off the steering wheel to wave goodbye.  I just smile. A real one. The first one in a long time. The last one for a long time. 

Id have gone back had I known.  I’d have gone back and begged him to take me away right then and there, if I knew that was the last time I’d ever see him.